28.7.08

This Is Why Women Don't Believe You or: Give Us Crotch

So, there's been a lot of hype over the new Supergirl team and how they're going to make her great and new and different and, as one of them said in a recent panel 'not slutty'. What an idea. And wow, how pathetic is it that 'not slutty' had to be a selling point for this book.

Which is awesome! Totally! See, we women have been just kind of wanting that, so it's really nice to hear.

Except for how I get this in last week's shipment (excuse the flash glare and whatnot):


Feel free to click and examine, I'll still be here when you get back. And by 'examine', I don't mean examine like you would a porn. Though clearly that was the aim here.

I love how 'she won't be slutty' has become a selling point for this title and yet, her promo poster shows her pointing to her mouth like a well-seasoned porn star. No one can say that isn't what she's doing--what the hell else would she be pointing at? What possible other reason is there to pose like that? That's a "put it right here, big boy" face and just a tip--real girls don't do that. Real girls don't do that unless there's something they are bargaining for or are newlyweds.

It's fucking ridiculous, is what it is, and this is why women in comics bitch.

Granted, a lot of people seem to get pretty up in arms about really, really stupid things that I tend to not agree with, but this one? I'm leading the train, because goddammit, if artists are going to over-sexualize everything with a rack, by God I want some equal treatment. You know what I want?

Crotch.

That's right. I'm going to start my campaign for crotch shots. Yeah, yeah. That's what I'll do. "Campaign For Crotch" with a slogan of, "Men Are Objects Too!!". Did anyone notice Robin's suspicious lack of bulge in his last issue with that fine, fine last page pose? I did.

I'll accept ass shots too, or some fine, fine arm muscles. I want equal fucking objectification. I want my men half-naked with their asses thrust out as they bend over to pick up their weapons. I want superfluous ass shot and crotch shot panels. I want objectification of men all over the issue covers and I want it now.

Combine the whoredom of a teenage girl and a marketing ploy that involves her become a better treated character and mix in a healthy dose of 'This Is The Girl That Wouldn't Touch Me In High School So Now I'll Show HER' and you get my utter disgust. Guys, this is why ladies don't believe anything you say. Just to let you know.

Campaign for Crotch starts now. Who's in?

23 comments:

wicked juan said...

Quid pro quo.

Evie said...

UGH GUH GUH GUH.

And yes. Pump up the wangs, Alex Ross style.

kylestevensmusic said...

I'm in?

Kirk Warren said...

What's the scale on that poster? I hope it's not life-size... that would be kind of sad.


And for the ladies out there, here's a nice beefcake superhero website for you (SFW as far as I can tell).

Shirtless Superheroes

Please don't ask why I know about this website. Now, off to find out where I can order that Supergirl poster. =p

PalinDrome said...

That is actually NOT related to the upcoming Supergirl changes at all but instead is one of the covers for an upcoming issue of Final Crisis. So blame JG.

Kristina said...

@Kirk: Ahahahaha. This is so my new favorite site. I love the phrase 'beefcake' too.

I'd send you ours, but I think that's illegally peddling porn.

@P: It's related to it in the sense that they're pressing her ongoing as something worth female attention, but that's good to know.

Dammit, JG.

John said...

Geez... it's so obvious that she is talking in to her finger, not pointing at her mouth. I mean, it's clear that she's listening to her other hand, isn't it? Obviously, a new superpower for an otherwise underpowered character. She can now use her hands as a cell phone.

Thomas Fummo said...

I'm in I guess.

though I'm not prepeared to start drawing Eugene's crotch.
And I'd hate to see what a tutu monkey's crotch would look like...

hmm.

Elwood said...

I thought she was listening to a cellphone, too. Maybe she's hungry? Has a cavity? Bulimic?

I'm on board with your "the cheerleader pantsed me in gym glass so now I'll draw her like a painted whore and stuff her in a fridge" theory, tho.

Ally said...

Oh, Supertorso! Tis her destiny to stand around looking whorish. Occasionally she may fight crime. If it doesn't cut into the amount of time she needs to stand around and point at her mouth.

I am all for the beefcake movement. I suggest Nightwang be our posterchild, as he often cannot go more than a single issue without showing us his crotch. (For the record, I'm not complaining.)

Dr. Zoltar said...

I just want my Linda Danvers back. She was a worthy Supergirl.

But DC has been whoring out characters for a while. Starfire barely wears something that is considered a costume. I've also noticed Zatanna and Huntress showing more and more skin with their new costumes.

Oracle_Batgirl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Oracle_Batgirl said...

Now honestly with all the pre-twitter flutter over this poster I expected to see Supergirl down on her knees, mouth wide open ready to have a porntasm but...

this'll do though. ;)~

As for equality objectification (jesus that's a long word) I'd say it's out there. Those 'couldn't get the girl' double DD drawing pimply nerds (all grow-ed up awwww) LOVE to draw the man-hero with all the extra muscles god forgot and yes, bulging manly uh...goodies. So boob for bicep you get your cha-ching and bow chicka bow. I will say this, Image/Top Cow have porn chops like few other companies...all they need is the porn 'stache on their logos. :)

*disclaimer* Image and Top Cow may NOT sue for defamation because it's mostly true. That said, they have good titles out there.

Unknown said...

I guess if we guys get promo posters of supergirl begging for a shot to the face it only fair you ladies get some stripped down man objectification too. So I'm in too, lets send millions of angry letters to DiDio demanding more crotch.

@KW: I'm gonna ask anyway, "How The Hell Do You Know About That Website?"

Kirk Warren said...

@oracle_batgirl - Okay, how about this image? Dirty enough for you? =p


@themaimedman - Well, funny story, that. You see *throwsninjasmokebombandflees*!

wicked juan said...

@KW: You win for taking it to a whole new low. Someone needs to have their pens and pencils taken away, a task for which I volunteer. And I'm not above using force. :)

Arkonbey said...

personally, I could do without super-guy crotches, but I'm in: fair is fair!

I could also do without Supergirl looking like she's thinking weally hard and stuff, ya know?

shadow said...

The cover for the next "Mrs. Marvel" isn't much better. My wife was pissed when she saw it.

Kirk Warren said...

They posted a clearer image on Newsarama today in an interview with Jones.

Supergirl Image

Tyler said...

Uhm...... well, as much as i wouldn't want to see crotches all over the place, i agree with what you are saying, and have for a long time now. why Supergirl wears a skirt is beyond me, but it did lead to some funny jokes about it in Blue Beetle

Anonymous said...

I'm bummed I missed out on "slutty Supergirl". When did this happen and who was she slutty with?

Unknown said...

This seems relevant to your interests!
http://odditycollector.livejournal.com/97166.html

qtilla said...

Uhm... I don't want to see crotches. I mean, I'm not anti-crotch. But you know, junk kinda looks like unfortunate vacuum parts....

I think in comics the men look the way men kinda want to look and the women look the way most people want them to look.

That being said, I think if I were battling the forces of evil I would probably wear pants and uhm... other clothes.

Also, I agree that the poster is ridiculously porny.