Wise Feminism

The idea of demanding a product and then immediately rejecting that product before it ever reaches your fingertips is one that is both confusing and laughable.

Why would you spend a large chunk of your time (fuck, any chunk of time) demanding, for example, a Female Centered Comic Book and then, when that Female Centered Comic Book comes to fruition, exclaim that you refuse to buy it because you do not like the way it is being pressed.

I might be talking about Marvel Divas again.

I criticized the pitch. I broke the pitch down, sentence by sentence, and discussed what irritated me about it as well as what I liked. The pitch is built on partial suck. The pitch isn't what ultiately matters. It's the product. If, as a reader, the way something is pitched isn't exactly appreciated, make it known. I'm not suggesting that anyone keep their mouth shut, but what I am suggesting is a modicum of common sense.

Well, it seems like common sense to me to give a book that is built a bit around the fact that women like reading about women a bit of a chance.

Here's what also makes sense to me: money. And more importantly, money makes sense to the business producing such a product. Not just money, but numbers. Clearly numbers are important in the comics industry, where when Secret Invasion beats out Final Crisis everyone pisses themselves in one direction or another and makes a big fucking deal out of it. The same thing goes for a book like, uh, Marvel Divas.

Say all the people out there who have been asking for a book about heroines buys the first issue. Say the first issue is less than awesome and turns out to be what a lot of us fear: Just Another Booby Fest. Don't buy the second issue. The numbers will drop off and that's what a businessman sees. Joe Quesada is, at his core, a businessman. As a editor-in-chief of Marvel, this is what he ought to be. He has to consider multiple sides of everything and pitch for the numbers. If feminists keep outrightly rejecting books on the basis that 'surely, this is like every other book and I refuse to pander to their covers, and also refuse to buy albums/movies/etc based on their sexy covers because I never, ever, ever give in at all to Sex Sells', our numbers will never blip on the map.

Consequently, the businessmen will have no idea what the numbers could be. If everyone that's demanded a book like this buy it and find that it is, in fact, a booby fest that has no real value and then do not buy any more of them, this will be noticed. What is not noticed (shockingly) is when these readers don't bother to show up to the party at all, after clamoring for the party to be held. This is a foolish thing to do.

Don't ask for a book about women and then reject a book about women before it's even hit the shelves. Reject the book after you've purchased the first issue and you don't like it. Give Joe Quesada the evidence of your existence, not just an angry post on the internet. Give him what matters to Marvel: the lack of your money. Show that the money is there and when you do not like the product, take that money away. Take it away and demand a better product.

Buy the first issue of Marvel Divas. Help prove to the industry that the number of people who want quality books actually exists. Show up to the party, then do what you want from there, but it is critical that we actually goddamned show up. Joe Quesada is not perusing Livejournal in his free time and giving serious consideration to complaints that show up there, but go no further than bitching in comments. Joe Quesada is considering the money, so show him that your money can be there for him, given that he can give a product that you actually want to buy. If the $3.99 (is it 3? or 2? whatever) is important to your budget, return the book. Talk to your comic seller and say, 'hey, if I hate this, is it okay if I return it? Or can I exchange it for something else that I know that I like?'.

Be a wise feminist and utilize business values. Take their game and make it yours. Your voice is your wallet, not your livejournal/blog/whatever. Use your voice.

Pass it on.

This Week In Comics Or: Campaign For Crotch Starts Here

Due to my new Campaign For Crotch, I've added some new aspects to the superhero comics I'm reviewing: Crotch Shot and Ass Shot counters. I'm debating a Rack Shot as well, but we'll see. Also added is Gems, which are just specific wonderfuls from an issue I liked.



I'm going to start off with Locke & Key #6 because it was everything a final issue should be. Which is spectacular when you bring in the fact that this winter, it's back (24 issues I think?) with Locke & Key: Head Games. Gabriel Rodriguez banged the art out on this one--he can match Joe Hill's writing so perfectly, keep the creepy coming and the character's expressions are always dead on to the dialogue (see a bad example of this in Ms. Marvel, page 14, I believe).

Jay Fotos on color can't be ignored either, as he does an excellent job with finishing the art and keeping the mood as well.

But the real prize here is the story--this is one of the best final issues I've read in a while, it keeps the suspense and the mysteries up for just the right amount of time and involving every one of the Locke family members in rescuing them from uncertain, scar-faced peril made me immensely happy. And the last three pages just make it rock. A very, very nice 'It isn't over yet, see us in the winter' smack without undoing the resolution we get from the previous pages.

Gems: A 30 Days Of Night poster on in one of the kid's bedrooms. Utter confirmation that girls in wells are still immensely creepy. Little boys seeing the evil no one else does. Best ghostly images ever. Magical Key sex changes are the awesome.

Recommendation: It's too late now, isn't it? So make sure you order the trade and put Locke & Key: Head Games on your pull lists for the winter.



Ms. Marvel #29: I added this one to my grab list because I was so completely rocked by her awesomeness in #28 that I was compelled to see how awesome she was again. Greg Horn's cover aside, I wasn't disappointed. Brian Reed writing, Adriana Melo penciling the first ten pages and Paulo Siquera taking over pages 11 through 16.

I really, really liked the art, but it's clear I like Melo and not Siquera. There's this panel on what I think is page 14--if my counting skills are decent--where she and Agent Sum are talking on the street and suddenly there's a Lord Of The Rings style mob of Skrulls heading towards them. What she's saying is, "And right now, I'd like an easily defensible position" with some Skrully Language Text above the bubble, but her and Agent Sum's expressions look like they're surprised.

Um. Dude, she just spent the better part of two issues kicking a ton of Skrull ass. I'm pretty sure at this point a huge mob isn't going to get her to open-mouth shock. She looks childishly surprised and it does not match what she's saying at all.

Way to strike a pet peeve there. Gragh.

Ms. Marvel's fucking bad--she would've narrowed her eyes, squared herself off and and taken them on. Just saying.

Other than that, though, I really liked this issue. Especially the extremely creepy last three pages. Ritualistic killing = creepy love.

Gems: First page, Ms. Marvel telling everyone to run as the Big Ass Skrull closes in--she looks fucking bad ass. Lightning eyes coming through smoke/rubble. "Alright you gigantic Skrull &%$#". All her thoughts. "Welcome to New York." Wanting to have a Skrull bonfire. Crazy Skrull doing ritualistic killings.

Ass Shots: Ms. Marvel: 9

Crotch Shots: Skrull: 3

Recommendation: I'm adding it to my pull list--over all this is a really well-written female superhero comic with a few art bumps that I can forgive, only for Reed's writing.



Blue Beetle #29: Well, Rogers is credited on the cover, but don't let that fool you, because it's actually Matthew Sturges writing with Rafael Albuquerque doing the art as well as the terrific, terrific cover.

This is Sturges first issue and aside from a few little bumps--only one that really stuck with me, which was just that the Scarab didn't seem to have the same vibe with Jaime as before--I really, really took to his writing well.

Great issue, keeping him funny and clever and as immensely loveable as he's always been.

Teenagers should always be written like this, so I hope another teenager writer is paying attention here.

This issue is kicking off another arc, Boundaries, where Jaime learns what a title fight is and then runs into some border jumpers, gets suckered by a pretty girl's sob story and he ends up needing to track down the guys who have Steroid Super-Juice (not Deathstroke's, they're boys and the Evil Man Juice is Girls Only). This is a wonderful set-up issue and a really good jumping on point if you haven't been keeping up with this book.

The one-liners in this issue were outstanding. Let me say it again: outstanding. Sturges can give lessons on them.

Gems: "Whoa--there are some people who should just not attempt a Power Girl costume"-Nadia. Anything Peacemaker says--all of it can just go right onto a t-shirt as far as I'm concerned. Title fights: when a villain dies and two guys fight for the name. "No way man, I already got the tattoo!" Anything Peacemaker says. Anything. Teenage boys saying, "I don't actually understand what's happening here." Jaime making his own sound effects. Jaime still be excited about having a secret identity. Jaime sucking at being on TV. Jaime. "Magnetist".

Crotch Shots: Peacemaker: 1
Jaime: 1
Some Fat Guy: 1 (also? underbelly. ew.)

Recommendation: Awesome. Add it to your list if it wasn't there already. I was really, really pleased with Sturges and he should be quite pleased with himself for knocking out a great issue.



Pilot Season: The Core #1. If you haven't read by The Nightly News by Jonathon Hickman yet, how about you get to that this week? Or now.

He does it again and this time it's a sci-fi story. He throws you right into a world that is clearly well-defined (or seems very well-defined), so everything is very believable when offered up.

We're following a human, Asimov Dedeken, as he tries out for Selection to become part of an elite military team, Red Sector and all the way through to the end of his first mission.

Dedeken is immediately likeable--and delicious, ladies--as are the members of his team. As are the mysteries surrounding an intergalactic federation. As is everything about this story, but I'm determined not to get too spoilery.

This is awesome and that's what you need to know. It's all the way awesome and gives me heavy, heavy voting conflict with Jay Faerber's Urban Myths. Basically, I'll vote twice for each and leave it at that. Hopefully no matter how this goes, we can get more from The Core, because I'm outrageously curious--maybe . . . yes, Hickman earns the extra vote because I'm just so damn curious. Fantastic teaser issue--Hickman lays out the world for us with disgusting ease, brings the reader right in and ties it all together with a letter to home but still digging his hooks in so we want more, more, more.

The art by Kenneth Rocafort is gorgeous and perfectly my taste and the center page listing populations and descriptions of part of the core areas is fascinating. His panel work, the way he makes them flow together is just great. Exceptional colors brought to us by Dave McCaig and Nathan Fairbairn.

Gems: All of it. No, really. This book blew me away. Especially Kryssun'Duldin-Wamul, who is a gorgeous non-human female with plenty of attitude and sharp looks. I love sharp girls.

Recommendation: Get it. Then vote for him in August. Hot damn.


I'll post the rest tomorrow morning, as there's a reorder sitting here with my name on it. The rest being, Green Lantern, Joker's Asylum: Two Face, Skaar Son of Hulk, Narcopolis, Huntress and Reign In Hell.

Comment away!

This Week's Read Pile, or: You Get Screwed, I Get Sparklers

Note: So I had half these typed up Weds night and then I figured I'd get to it during work on Thursday. And then Thursday was intensely busy (until Brian showed up, naturally), so I didn't get to it. And Thursday night I played Katamari and drank mojitos to celebrate getting through the hellish traffic. So really, nothing got done except swearing and rolling. And a lot of bad 'this is how I roll' jokes.

And then it was fireworks, margaritas, Magic and me unsuccessfully attempting to convince my friends they wanted to be a Tiefling Warlord or somesuch.

My friends clearly don't love me like they used to.

Also, we watched UFC and I'm pretty sure no one reading about comic books is also watching UFC except, uh, me, but let me take a moment to say: Forrest Griffin, you are the goddamn man. Not only can I not believe you lasted more than two rounds against Rampage Jackson, I can't believe you're the new belt holder. Also, it was an awesome five round fight and your stand-up has improved (and should improve more, if you'd like to keep that handsome new belt). Awesome. Super-impressed, I am. Watch out for Machida and Friends, you should.

More to the point, there's only . . . uh. Four reviews this week. Because it's Monday and you don't really care what I have to say, right?

That said, I'm starting with Batman R.I.P. (but only because this totally needs to go first. Screw salt and starch.)

Amusingly, I got texted about this issue and I got two 'wtfmycheese' e-mails. All of which are awesome, especially texting with George, because his what-the-fuckery is great (even if he forgets about me ::dies alone::).

Anyhow? I wasn't the only person that double-checked to make sure an issue didn't get missed in between this one and the last--good to know. Thanks to Bruce being shot up with drugs by Dr. Hush (right, that's his name) I can now employ the phrase "Batcrack" justifiably. Or "Batsmack". Wonderful. Because that's what my repetoire needed. Really!

My first thought after finishing this one was "wtf?" As was my second. My third read-through (really, this needed three?) was that Grant Morrison writes an awesome fucking trade comic. Maybe not so much monthlies, but I've seen much, much, much worse (even from the Batman line. War Games, anyone?). The issue's tempo reflects (sort of) Bruce's mindset--it's very disjointed, very off its ball and it's actually impressive an entire little story got told through the mood and pacing.

I'm a little irritated Nightwing got taken out off-panel, especially since the accompanying Nightwing wasn't a R.I.P. tie-in to show the off-panel shenanigans, but that's nobody's fault, really.

Tim Drake remains to be awesome. I wonder if he's sharing fashion advice with Jason?

Speaking of Jason, um, when's he showing up? Come on already, I want to see Morrison writing him. Very curious.

We get to find out Alfred's not dead (Realizing Its Pennyworth?! Redemption In Pennyworth??), no surprise, and more importantly: Mr. Fabulous Shoulder Pads has moved into the Batcave. Can you believe the set of platinum balls on this guy? Talking about making Bruce his butler?! Listen, man, as soon as Bruce sobers up and stops talking to his imaginary friend he's going to--

. . . sew himself a Zur-En-Arrh batsuit and pose with Batmite.

Hum.

Right then.

Recomendation: I'm still dealing with the Zur-En-Arrh suit and trying to figure out why Morrison has the memory of an elephant after doing all those drugs. Seriously, Grant, um . . . my memory is a bit shoddy after all mine and I'm definitely not . . . aged. To that point. That you are. Just saying.


Hyperkinetic #1: Howard Shum writing and Matteo Scalera on art with Oscar Celestini doing colors. I liked it! I wasn't disappointed--and hey, there may be some complaints from other females about the girl banter, but I personally liked it. Seriously--have you ever lived with three women of the same age? That's what it's like. You know, I wasn't armed with an awesome gun or fighting crazy things on an alien planet, but it's the same theory.

I'm taking a moment to inform you all that no one has ever peed in my shampoo.

I thought the art was pretty excellent and fun and was insanely pleased to see very little gratuitous shots of the girls and the story is interesting and . . . yep. Solid. Totally solid and interesting and--dude, chicks with guns. Chicks with guns who know how to use them.

Recommendation: Pick this up, this four-issue miniseries will be an enjoyable one.

The rest of the comics I previewed . . . I pretty much liked. (Pssst, this is where the laziness kicks in). Except Astonishing X-Men 25, but I think that's just because Ellis was coping with the fuckery that was the Whedon run and just said, 'fuck it, we're jumping ahead in time because I'm impatient'. I'll definitely give this a few issues to even up, but beware of a lot of dialogue that has . . . pretty much nothing to do with mostly anything.

And that's IT, suckers. Hope you all had a happy fourth and didn't blow up anyone's house, blow off a thumb or drink yourselves intensely stupid.

Books That Look Good (or not) and Other Cool Stuff

So does anyone else's browser occasionally crash when they attempt to load Image's website? Three out of five times, goddammit. Christ, let me look at your books!

There's a lot of random stuff this week--and a myriad of collected links regarding cool stuff I've stumbled across in my internet adventures. Enjoy! Or not.

Image

Dynamo 5 #14: So much fun. That is all.

Noble Causes #35: I'm enjoying the time jump immensely--how about you guys? I enjoyed the alternate dimension reset too, frankly. I think it's quite easy to get bogged down in cliches, but the way Jay Faerber cheerfully employs them keeps them fresh and fun and reminds me why they became a cliche in the first place. It isn't always a terrible thing. Take a note, writers: It is possible to use a cliche without ever letting it become an ugly, uninspired mess of a thing.

His entry into the Top Cow Pilot Season 2008, Urban Myths looks great, as does Fran Bueno's pages for Undying Love, a series still in the birth process. I'm going to entertain the fantasy that the only thing Jay Faerber ever does is hide away with his computer and write awesome comics--because if I ever hear he has free time for an actual life, I may just implode.

So basically, this morning while we were brushing our teeth and groggily searching around for coffee, Jay F. was knocking off the third script of the day and had gotten up a half hour after we did. And he was magically wooing fantastic artists.


Hyperkinetic #1: Written by Howard Shum, art by Matteo Scalera and colors done by Oscar Celestini. This is a sci-fi action comedy about four intergalactic bounty hunters (and their robot) who end up going through a wormhole and crash-landing on an alien planet.

You can peek at some page previews right here at Shum's website.

I really like the art--it looks really dynamic and fun and the preview of the story peaked my interest as well, so I'm definitely gonna give this four-issue run a shot.

And on an awesome note: There was not a single gratuitous thong shot in any of the preview pages, I am so pleased.




The Astounding Wolf-Man #7: Oh, what's that? You haven't been reading this? Shame on you, now you can't find any and will have to pick up the trade.




The Sword TPB #1: And for all of you that've either missed the boat or just waited for the trade on all Luna goodness, here it is.

An awesome modern fantasy book about a woman who finds a sword after her family is murdered, brought to you by the Luna Brothers.

Also recommended (highly): Ultra Girl. Because getting laid can be a bitch.










Oh, hey--have you asked your local store to make sure I Kill Giants lands into your hands/subscription boxes? The first issue is coming out next week--make sure you don't miss it.

It's a story about a smart ass fifth-grader, Barbara Thorson, who carries around a war hammer in her bag and kills giants. Well, in her imagination she does. Or maybe not just in her imagination.

Joe Kelly and J.M. Ken Niimura are going to rock you out with a poignant story about a girl and the giants in her worlds. I predict heavy awesomeness.

IDW

Angel: After The Fall #10
Doctor Who #5
And don't you dare miss Ghost Whisperer #4. What a gem!

Seriously IDW, what is that title doing in your company?

And hum, hum, hum: Ben Templesmith signs an exclusive and has a book coming out in August, Welcome to Hoxford. Good and the promo pic to the left needs to be a poster on my wall.

Hmm, wait . . . can I have him?

Dark Horse

Buffy #16: The long-awaited introduction of the Fray storyline and Joss is back in the writer's seat, kicking off a new 'episode' for the series.

Hellboy: The Crooked Man #1: Hellboy meets Tom, a man who sold his soul to a demon known as the Crooked Man. They travel to the Appalachian mountains in an attempt to save Tom's soul.

There's no such thing as too much Hellboy.

DC

The All-New Atom #25

Batman #678

Billy Batson and the Magic of Shazam! #1: You're picking this up, right? Right? Look at the adorable.

Blue Beetle #28

The Joker's Asylum: Joker: I sincerely hope that this isn't Joker-as-a-funny-haha-clown villain and is Scary As Hell Joker. Fingers crossed.

Manhunter #32

Nightwing #146

I sat here attempting to think of informative things to say about this week's DC releases or some sort of preview or whatnot and eventually came up with . . . pretty much nothing. I'm looking forward to seeing all these hit the shelves, really looking forward to reading them and . . . that's it. There'll be fun in the reviews, dammit.

Perhaps I need more caffeine. Or lunch.

Marvel

Astonishing X-Men #25: I really, really like the new costumes. Lots. Simone Bianchi is extraordinarily talented. And that Ellis guy isn't bad either. (whoreswhoresfuckwhores)

Secret Invasion: Front Line #1: I love the Front Line concept and am really looking forward to this from Brian Reed.

All Other Shenanigans

So, you've all probably seen this post by Paul Pope regarding Battling Boy, right? Oh well, I'm showing you again because I am so pleased by it. His description of the book leaves me very hopeful we can see it in the stores sooner rather than later.

"Battling Boy is the son of a god or a super hero—it is left unspecified—who comes down from the top of a mountain (or rather, from inside a cloud/UFO contraption/contrivance from above a mountain top) at this father's behest, in order to rid a giant city from it's plague of monsters. Hercules had his labors, Batman has his Gotham, Battling Boy has his Monstropolis."

Quite nice.

Also, his clothing line via DKNY is due out soon--August, right?

One day I'll get to meet him, dammit. Eventually. Maybe.

And look, Gerard Way can read my mind. The moment I got done with Umbrella Academy, I thought, "Well, that was fucking fantastic, but I really wish I could've seen some shenanigans from their teenaged years. Also, I want figurines." One out of two, so far, because on July 2nd there's going to be a short story on Dark Horse's MySpace Presents page from Way and Ba. Also, there's a comic tie-in to Dr. Horrible's Singalong Blog from Joss Whedon. Also, a Tara McPherson story, "How To Heal A Broken Heart".

This will definitely soothe the wounds caused by visiting a MySpace page.

Batman vs Batman vs Batman, especially for Oracle Batgirl, who I got to meet today and is awesome.

This is exceedingly clever. And funny.

The Awesomed By Comics podcast remains to be awesome and is actually increasing in its Awesome and hilarity. Click that link and go check it out. I need to remember to email them, actually, and inform Aaron how misled he is regarding Countdown and Grant Morrison's involvement in it. Oh look, problem solved (perhaps?) Aaron: You're misled. Gravely, gravely misled. Morrison didn't want them to touch the New Gods at all. From what I understand, he wanted the very first mention of them to be that first scene where Orion is discovered dead.

Also: Daaaaaaaamn.

Edit: Aha! I remember now. Go check out Bananaglass, which is odd and hilarious and quite clever. And don't forget to comment and inform him of such.

Speaking of damn, I need to start making bookmarks proper, I keep losing neat sites. Anyhow, that's mostly it--enjoy the rest of the day and comment if you think I might've forgotten something.

I just realized I didn't bitch about anything this week. Odd.

This Week's Read Pile, or: Whedon The Astonishing Two-Trick Pony!

So! Holy my crapola, Marvel, did any trees survive the Secret Invasion? Really, none?

Hey, at least Bush doesn't need to destroy that pesky forest for oil, even though we totally don't need them if SOMETHING could get the proper resources! Oh, like all the money we're wasting on oil! Just a thought. /politico.

Onto the comics. I promise.



Trinity #4: I think it's been well-established by now that Busiek writes the why of the trinity perfectly at this point--I'm going to repeat this exact sentence later, because it's so, so true. No matter what else you might want to say about this book, the three of them are down so pat it's something kind of beautiful.

Through the eyes and dialogue of the Peepers, we can see why they're the best crime-fighting trio ever. Superman the Savior, Wonder Woman the Inspiration and Batman the Sneaky Ninja Brains (also, he scares the hell out of people). There's a cool fight, more Batman Love which I'm finding hilarious and generally really excellent, solid dialogue.

And I realized what my big problem is--it isn't the pacing of it or the writing or the art, it's the conflict. Which is really . . . kind of flat so far. Not the Peepers--them I'm enjoying immensely. Really.

Here's what I would've enjoyed more: A longer set-up. Smaller battles, just them being them and slowly stumbling onto something that wouldn't demand explaining right away. Busiek writes them just being them so goddamn well--their interactions and the whys of how they're the trinity perfectly. So maybe something that just tied in slowly, so we could get Wonder Woman and Batman and Superman being supremely awesome in their own right with now pressure. Think Monster of the Week that slowly progresses into Awesomeness.

The Joss Theory.


Recommendation: It's still not striking as hot with me as I wish, considering I really love the team on this book and over-all it's done awesomely--something I'm attributing to both Weekly Burnout and Not Great Insta-Conflict. I don't like Insta-Conflict anyways. I can see big, big fans with a bit of disposable income picking this one up and riding out the beginner bumps, but if that's not you, perhaps you can pick up the trade to this when it's out and there's a slow comics week.

"Tut. Such admiration in your voice once again. He is a man, Enigma. Dressed in silk and leather, armed with . . . tricks and toys."

Enigma is totally running his one-man fanboy operations for Batman in the DCU. Love it.




Ms. Marvel #28: Brian Reed's writing this one and Adriana Melo is on pencils. I've found Ms. Marvel to be kind of a joke for . . . oh, maybe ever. But this issue I picked up because I like to have some faith and it was a tie-in and the last two issues have grabbed my interest a bit.

Um. She's . . . totally bad-ass in this. I'm already bored with the gratuitous body shots, but other than that, the pencils were gorgeous and the writing . . . well, Jesus. She kicks ASS in this issue. I actually reread it twice, just because I enjoyed the hell out of watching her punch people and really enjoyed her thoughts.

The plot synopsis is such a simple formula: There's a lot of Skrulls that need Carol to beat the hell out of them. So she does. But along the way, she reflects and rediscovers and connects with herself in such a basic, honest way that I'm intensely impressed by.

Recommendation: Grab it, even if you have no idea what the hell's going on, it's really self-explanatory and a great, great Girls Solidly and Cleverly Kicking Ass read. I love it when a chick's got some muscle and uses it.

"I punch until my knuckles hurt, and then I hit a little harder"




Young Avengers Presents: Hawkeye: Matt Fraction writing, Alan Davis pencils.

So, hey, if anyone happens to talk to Matt at the upcoming con (he's headed to one, right?), how about mentioning how purely fucking awesome this comic was? And, oh, ask if I'm hallucinating the not-right-chemistry between the Hawkeyes. Thanks.

This was gold--I enjoyed the other Presents, but this is the one that I found completely excellent. Kate's terrific, I think she's how Cassie over in DC should've been and the story told is so true to that, true to the conflicts of a teenage superhero in a world that has gone beyond screwed up, with no real heroes to look up to anymore and it's just . . . just go get it. I could spend a good chunk of this post discussing spoilers, but I don't think I will. Just go grab it and enjoy the too-short great of this shot.

I have to say too, that Davis' pencils purely reflected the writing and it was just . . . a nice little symphony. Marvel, I am SHOCKED. Two in a row.

Recommendation: You're really not paying attention if you need this filled.

"Who says two buds can't just cruise in a horse-drawn carriage? Me and my boys do it all the time.

Allllllll the time.

This is how we roll."

Poor teen-aged boy.



Huntress #4: Oh, hey, another awesome Huntress issue. The plot continues--there's a great fight scene, an interesting conversation while an arrow punctures a palm, the best conversation so far in this book, a funeral and a haircut and then Helena gets let back to Gotham.

The best conversation? Her and Barbara. Totally. I would like to frame those pages for some excellent posterity--for Barbara's attempts at making a foreign friend alone, is this comic awesome. Good thing it's got a whole bunch of other awesome stuff in it.

Also featured: The Bat Family being creepy in their own home. Excellent!

Recommendation: Pick it up already!

"Can't say my name. And what would I talk about with her? That I'm increasingly favoring kevlar and body armor? I'm sure we'd have a lot in common."




Batman: Gotham After Midnight #2: Steve Niles and Kelley Jones again and God, this is extremely delicious. Batman's cape remains to be completely epic--I think Robin's trapped up in there somewhere, attempting some desperate acrobatics to get free.

The story continues from Batman being seemingly dead and the thugs cheering contentedly around his body. And then they have to go ruin Batman's plan by being stupid and trying to axe him. Literally, actually, and in comes some supremely fine Batman inner-dialogue, because we all know the crazy bastard likes to talk to himself. There's some fine punching here, as well as a nice double-page splash that shamelessly exploits his cape some more (no little green boots sighted, Robin must've shifted).

We get villain reveal (kind of) who looks nice and creepy. We get more of his normal villains acting quite strangely and more from the detective lady and more of Niles' clever writing.

Lots more and Jones' art is as much a treat. Especially that cape. Good Gods, the cape.

Recommendation: This is a complete treat that should turn into a classic Batman story in time. It isn't overly heavy or intensely-laden with an over-reaching continuity that would otherwise bog the story down. So, Batman fans, this one's for you. And fans of Steve Niles. And really great crime story fans (because hey, Niles remembered Batman's a detective--something that tends to get pushed to the side in a few other books that have him constantly punching stuff). And fans of beating people up.

And Epic Cape Fans. Definitely those.

"One thing you can always rely on with criminals is that sooner or later they will do something stupid . . ."




Runaways #30: Alright. Well, let's start this off on a great note: The cover is completely beautiful and I would really love a poster version of this. Nico's gorgeous and I think I'll dress like her for Halloween. Only, you know, I'm not a teenager--but I still can still PASS so long as people are assuming I'm a babysitter instead of a mother. It's only been . . . not even ten years yet. Shut up!

I'm segueing here, because discussing Joss Whedon being such an epic let down feels a wee bit sacrilegious. I went into this issue so exasperated with his entire run, but still expecting . . . Joss Worthy Stuff. He's delivered before and even though I didn't want to, my little fangirl heart held her breath and hoped.

And I got the two-trick pony ride, courtesy Ringmaster Joss. Also, the little fangirl heart passed out.

Here's what I'm tired of: The constant failure of relationships on an epic, heartbreaking level. Pssst, Joss: WE GET IT! FIND A NEW POINT!

I promise, the symbolism isn't lost on us! We get the rarity of a perfect relationship! We get that The World Is Fucked and finding a perfect relationship is a near impossibility! We're also starting to get that maybe-maybe you've got one card up your sleeve and it ain't the Queen of Hearts.

There was no reason for Lillie to stay in the past(present). Really. None. Here's a clue: Sixteen year-old girls to stupid, scary things for boys they're in lurve with all the time. Just look at MySpace! And sixteen year-old girls would do especially stupid, scary things for really yummy boys that adore them. Especially a girl that seems to have no real male role model (remember, this is one of your favorite things to do to all your characters)! They tend to seek stability, you know, and things that are sturdy and anchor-shaped and if it comes in a really delicious Adores Her package, you can bet your Buffy that she'll take the jump.

Really, Joss, I thought you were better than this--do you really remember nothing from Buffy? I mean . . . where's the mojo gone? 'Cause I'm looking and I'm seeing . . .

A reprint of Astonishing. Bleh.

This issue was Not Awesome and I am Disappointed. I am completely underwhelmed by the wrap-up, completely underwhelmed by the character development over all, completely tired of the Same Old Conflicts and the Same Old Heartbreaks and really, all of this has me shouting, "NO MORE!" with feeling.

Reccomendation: Man, I can't believe I'm saying this: Forget about it. Wait for Terry Moore. I'm going to go drown my sorrow in some Jaynestown now.




Final Crisis #2: Solid. Awesome. I liked very much--I also think that unless something supremely epic happens, I'm saving my review for the next eight months and weighing in when all is said and done. (Note: OMG LAST PAGE IS AWESOME. ::cough:: That's all.)

Snag (or not) Pile for June 25, 2008

This week is looking rather small. Unless you count the EIGHTY GABILLION MARVEL TITLES.

Sweet Jesus on a pogo stick.

DC Titles

Monthlies

Batman: Gotham After Midnight #2: This title snuck up on me this week--pathetic, considering how much I've been looking forward to it, but oh well. I was so pleased with Niles' #1--sly and funny and quite clever--and this week the story is going to delve more into what's going on. Obviously.

DC's preview blurb: "The Batman has been ambushed by a gang of thugs who want only one thing: the death of the Dark Knight Detective. But there is more to this nefarious plan than it seems. For at the stroke of midnight, the mysterious monster behind this gang wants to strike fear into the hearts of all the citizens of Gotham City!"

I'm very much on board with this and really hoping to see some excellent creepy sliding throughout the story. I really prefer it when Batman titles stick to the shadows of the DCU, so to speak, and demonstrate how well he blends into the nighttime atmosphere of a battered Gotham.

Also, if Niles would thumb his nose at the whiners and toss a Bat!jet pack in, I'd be more than supremely golden. I liked the jet pack, dammit.

Final Crisis #2

Oh terrific, another week of bitching from people about Final Crisis, Morrison, J.G. Jones and editors. Super! Here's what I like about Final Crisis and Morrison's writing: You don't actually have to be a genius or crazy WAY-outside-of-the-box to get something out of it. Sure, sure, there are easter eggs, obscure references and really terrific symbolism scattered throughout everything he does. And okay, it can feel alienating when you know it's there and can't figure it out for yourself without some clever blogger or an interview with Morrison laying it out for you.

But Morrison does a very good job on making it accessible to the everyman. You don't need to know who Kamandi is to enjoy it. You don't need to know who the hell anyone is to get the gist of it. Sure, sure, knowing adds flavor--gives you the illusion of an inside track, but I don't honestly believe Final Crisis is excluding comic book fans. If a fan is that upset, all they really need to do is reacquaint themselves with Jack Kirby and maybe get a little high while contemplating the symbolism. Morrison's reach may not be as widely encompassing as Geoff Johns', for example, but it isn't exclusive to those who enjoy heavy craziness.

I'm recommending again, that everyone reread Final Crisis after the last one comes out and can guarantee it'll all make a gorgeous amount of sense straight-through. This isn't to say it doesn't make sense now--but this is one of the dangers of running a Big Event monthly. Secret Invasion is suffering the same problems for me that is solely based on my patience levels.

I'll cut myself off there before this turns into a rant. Here's the blurb:
"Meet Japan's number one pop culture heroes, the Super Young Team and their languid leader, Most Excellent Superbat! Join legendary wrestler Sonny Sumo and super escape artist Mister Miracle as they team to face the offspring of the Anti-Life Equation! See Earth's superheroes mourn one of their oldest allies! Witness costumed criminals sinking to new depths of cowardice and depravity as Libra takes things too far! Uncover the doomsday secrets of the poisoned city of Blüdhaven! Learn the shocking identity of the prime suspect in the murder of a god! And read on if you dare as Batman becomes the first of Earth's champions to face the Fallen of Apokolips. All this and a spectacular return from the dead..."
There's been some definite negative reaction from some fans regarding the nature of the Japanese pop culture heroes, but I don't care. (Oh, hey, there's my headache talking). I'm super-curious and very, very excited to see everything in this issue. DUDE, the Anti-Life Equation is going to ENSLAVE everyone! How is that not awesome?

Green Lantern #32

More Sinestro! Which I find extraordinarily pleasing, even if his mustache never fails to draw up the heroine tied to the train tracks scene. Aaaand if someone could draw Sinestro Old West Style for me, you'd get a thousand social credits. Which are useful . . . nowhere.

Moving on! It's Sinestro and all of his awesomeness and more of the Hal Jordan background that we all know and love and while some have grown tired of (or perhaps just impatient for the next storyline) the rehash, I'm still enjoying it.

"SECRET ORIGIN PART 4! Sinestro has been sent to Earth on a sacred mission, one that this new rookie Hal Jordan is getting in the way with. Plus, one of Hal Jordan's first enemies is born as a bizarre experiment backfires and another is unknowingly stalked for his connection to the Blackest Night! "

Huntress: Year One #4

I think I may want to cry when this mini is over. This has been some consistent awesomeness in my Read Pile as well as a surprise hit for me. God damn, I adore Helena and getting to see her roots again, being explored and revamped (I actually don't mind some of the things that were changed) has just been kick-ass and she definitely remains on my list of Chicks That Could Beat Your Ass (And Probably Should). Hmm, I smell future blog topic there. Noted.

This week, she heads back to Gotham and meets Bruce Wayne for this first time--an encounter which, at the very least, will be funny. My question is this: I totally forget where Dick was around this time. Will we be seeing Dick meeting Helena with Bruce? Because that'd be rock.

Teen Titans #60

I'd like to discuss the cover here, actually. It's really . . . strange. Completely different from the other covers on this book and I'm trying to figure out if that's on purpose or not. The answer to that is probably found inside, if it is a purposeful . . . flatness? Is that the right art description here? The thing with the stuff.

Anyway, the answer'll be inside and . . . I really, really can't bring myself to grab it. I'm breaking my super-awesome collected run of Teen Titans because I can't take McKeever anymore.

So someone stronger than I am, please comment at some point and fill me in on the cover.

Trinity #4

This makes it onto my list only by the grace of this being a small reading week for me--no, I will not be grabbing the eighty Secret Invasion titles. Even then, I think I'll be flipping through it in the store first. At some point, I know that Busiek will be hitting his stride with this and that stride will be filled with awesomeness. That stride hasn't happened yet and this title is quickly falling down to the bottom of the list for a lot of people and not because it's terrible, just because it's another weekly. Really, DC, please move this to a biweekly and save it and Busiek's sanity. On another note--this cover is the first of the next Big Picture and I think I'm probably going to end up day-dreaming about the Trinity covers being released as a collection of small posters. Please?

Trades

All Star Batman and Robin, The Boy Wonder Vol. 1

Yes! The terrific crack-fest has arrived! Next to Final Crisis and Huntress, this is what I've been looking forward to. This is an epic series. So completely epic. So very, very awesome that I can't actually believe it can be bound without imploding.

Collecting issues #1-9, Frank Miller and Jim Lee are retelling Dick Grayson's origin in the best possible way imaginable and if you haven't been reading this, now is the absolute perfect time to do yourself a huge favor and start. I think I'm going to kick my husband out of bed tonight and snuggle with this trade instead. The probability that it will hog the covers and kick me in the back? Nil.

Green Lantern: Tales of the Sinestro Corps

Collecting Green Lantern #18-20 (plus backup stories), Green Lantern Sinestro Corps Special #1 (plus backup stories), Tales of the Sinestro Corps: Ion, Tales of the Sinestro Corps: Parallax, Tales of the Sinestro Corps: Cyborg Superman, Tales of the Sinestro Corps: Anti-Monitor, and Green Lantern Sinestro Corps Secret Files.

Oh, what's this? Something that explores the villains in the Sinestro Corps storyline? How excellent for me. Here's a must to put on your bookshelf if you're collecting the Sinestro Corps War in trade (you DID grab Vol 2 last week, didn't you?).

Marvel

Monthlies

Angel: Revelations #2

. . . I'm not the only one reading this, right?

The first one was so great and I continue to be utterly owned and impressed by the art as previewed by CBR here. The story too, though, I've been loving as well. Warren's such a shit, I love it. Reading the genesis of his mutant abilities is interesting too and I'm getting heavily reminded why I like this character so much.

Runaways #30

First: Look at the cover. Guh. Completely gorgeous and I think I'd sell someone's soul for a poster of this.

Moving on: Yawn. Finally. I have no idea what the hell is going on, because I haven't read this in . . . oh, half a year? Longer? But I'm sure it'll be a perfect ending to a perfectly disastrous run on a book that I think is so insanely rife with potential.

Here's lookin' at you, Terry Moore. See you in August!

There is a whole slew of Marvel titles out, most of which I'll only flip through, but over at the Weekly Crisis, Kirk Warren did previews for them. So I'll direct you over there if you're curious about what not-Angel not-Runaways Marvel titles are hitting the street, because he handles Marvel titles really well (as well as accidentally doing a solid job on giving me a refresher course on what the hell is going on over there).

I think that's it--I really feel like I've missed a title in here somewhere though. Stupid Monday.

The Rest, Three Days Late

My weekend was hijacked by writing, which is why there wasn't a properly written up Rest Of on Friday.

Well, that and reviewing Sky Doll #2 keeps getting away from me and becoming intensely long. There's a lot of really, really great things to be said about this series. I'm pretty sure Kirk Warren reviews it best here. It's a fascinating read, one that's got some of the best art out there and absolutely fascinating themes lacing throughout the entire story. I'd review it, but Kirk already beat me to it with an excellent one.

Recommendation: Pick this up, definitely. And like I said last time, I'm pretty sure I'll be suckered into getting the trade for this as well as the monthlies.

Locke and Key #5 is another great issue in a series that's really knocking it out of the park for me. I've found the art to be solid and immensely enjoyable--as well as perfectly colored--and it enhances the mood of the story tenfold. The writing is poignant and in turns funny, terribly sad and immensely creepy.

The writer, Joe Hill (who I have belatedly discovered is Stephen King's son), balances the mystical aspects perfectly with horror in a story that should be more of a cliche than it is. The characters are typical archetype--older brother = guardian, middle sister = little mother to the brothers and youngest brother = too-curious-for-own good and a mother who is completely falling apart after the murder of her husband. These should be cliche--they are, goddammit, they are--but Hill has used this simplicity to snap together dynamics between them that are deep and unfolded a story that isn't just creepy, but significant.

One of the best tells of a truly good writer is how well they wield simplicity and Hill has been demonstrating the point astonishingly well so far.

Recommendation: You SHOULD have been picking this up. And now that you want to, you can't, because this has been the sleeper hit that I told everyone about, dammit, when the first issue hit the stands. And it's all sold out. Now you're going to have to wait for the trade.

I'm replacing Huntress #3 with Trinity #2 (lie, I was going to do both, but now I'm not. Nyah.)

So, Trinity #2. Alright, dammit, this issue grabbed me. From the title that had me snickering, "Personal Best At Robot Smashing" to the line "I do not swoon over costumed acrobats", I really enjoyed this issue. It was fun, dammit, in a way that Countdown never could have been and 52 definitely shouldn't have been. It's been a lot of fun reading these guys over the last two weeks.

Superman moves a solar system, Wonder Woman has a playdate with robots and Batman dissipates a mystic city with his willpower.

And this week, the second story was hysterical. I want a little Graak for myself. At the very least, I think I'll be making myself a Graak banner for something or another.

Over all? I felt this nailed it. I think that the story is progressing along a little slowly, but it's because Busiek is spending time on the characters instead, not twiddling his thumbs and wasting panels. And whenever a writer wants to over-compensate on character attention, I'm pretty much behind it.

Recommendation: It's fun. And funny. And a solid read that will help you remember why Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman are fun. I'll be picking it up next week and am really, really pleased to be doing so. And as a side note, Busiek should win an award for coming up with two of the funniest titles I've read in a while. Too many writers (or editors, maybe?) forget the small joys of having a funny one.

Joe Quesada is an Idiot

I've been waiting for a while for that First Post Inspiration to strike me, and as you can see by the title, it's struck.

Let me just say right now I'm not a big Marvel fan--there's the X-Men, depending on who's writing them, and that's pretty much it. But I do know the generalities of everything that's going on (Captain America is still dead and all the plot evils are either Skrulls or magic). So I also know the whole Brand New Day mess that Joe Q put together and I've been following his interviews where he defends/explains it.

Here's my disclaimer: I clearly know nothing about Joe Q's marriage, but I am going to build some natural assumptions based off how he's treated the institution via comics and what he's said in interviews.

During panel questions at Mega Con, as reported by Newsarama, Joe Q. said this: “My wife is okay with me saying this now — but my life before I was married was much more interesting than after I got married,” adding, “I didn’t have the stability that marriage provides — and that kind of stability can lessen the options of writers when engaging Peter Parker/ Spider-Man in his life and adventures. Spider-Man is much more interesting when the chance for more stories that create more conflicts can be achieved.”

. . . this is more ridiculous than a bag full of high weasels. So let's address it!

Joe Quesada, you're an idiot of the highest level. If your marriage is that uninteresting and therefore boring, I think you need to either get a divorce, introduce kinkier, crazy sex (see: swinging) and date nights or seek a marriage therapist. I remember being single, all footloose and fancy free, and it was an insane amount of fun. As is marriage in a completely different way and for completely different reasons. Astonishingly, you jackass, married couples still have a lot of fun--both together as a unit and seperate as their own people. As adults mature, which is a fact I assume you've heard about at some point in your life, they change and want different things. Stability, Joe Q., is not a death sentence. It is a different mode of living and it does not mean that things have to get boring, it really only means that you know who you're boning that night. Astonishing! Amazing! That's so UNCANNY!

(pardon that, I couldn't resist)

That is the worst excuse given for bad writing I have ever read and if the Marvel writing staff honestly cannot think of interesting things to do for a married man who is a superhero during such a volatile (theoretically) time in that 'verse, they all need to resign. Posthaste.

This, people, is what is wrong with the goddamn industry. While Joe Quesada and Company are busy living vicariously through Marvel's heroes because their marriages are terrifically uninteresting, they are slaughtering characterization to suit their needs, excusing shoddy writing for the sake of gaining/keeping/whatever a wide fanbase and yet again lowering the writing bar in the industry.

Yes, kids, you too could grow up and write comic books and if things get too hard or too difficult, just magic/Skrull/Superboy Prime punch/whatever it away! There's no reason to stick to any guns here, there's no reason to do a job that you've been hired to do and be an original, creative force! Pshaw! That's so ridiculous! Just magic it away, ignore the annoyed (and clearly idiotic) fans that resent mischaracterization and foolishly expect people/characters to behave like themselves in situations and START OVER! Fabulous! Because what you're doing here, what you're really doing when you work in the comic book industry, is keeping a wide fanbase (this means money, kids!!) and living vicariously through your writing due to your boring marriage. Good luck!

I have to move on from what he said about the marriage before I blow a gasket.


"If we keep Spidey rejuvenated and relatable to fans on the horizon, we can manage to do that and still keep him enjoyable to those that have been following his adventures for years. . . . At the end of the day, my job is to keep these characters fresh and ready for every fan that walks through the door, while also planning for the future and hopefully an even larger fan base." --Joe Q in a CBR interview.

. . . *headdesk* See. Okay. I understand this--I really do. It even almost makes sense if you take away ALL of his other comments on this issue and how horrendously and messily executed this storyline was. I understand the desire to keep a character fresh. I also understand keeping characters relatable. I agree with these desires and wants, it's one of the ways writing gets sold, it's how characters become popular and interesting. We don't run around in silly outfits saving the day, naturally, but we want to relate to the people who do.

Joe Quesada was almost not wrong here. Except for how he really, really was. If there is a question about a character not being relatable anymore to new, incoming fans (which there was), then what needs to occur--instead of MAGIC and pithy reasoning--is, drum roll please, THE INTRODUCTION OF A NEW CHARACTER.

Amazing! Astonishing! UN-FRIGGIN'-CANNY!!

Listen up, brain trust, when a decision is made to 'settle down' a character via marriage, I think that you are stuck with it. Now this isn't to say something better than magic could've occured to dissolve the marriage--I'd wager that's something a talented writing team and a smart editor could've come up with--but plenty of interesting things could've gone on. Marriage isn't a death sentence and personally, I don't appreciate that message being broadcast, thanks so much. I also think that instead of bitching out and magicking something away, a brand new character could've been introduced. Someone those young, happenin', non-boring kids could relate to!!

And damn, look at how I didn't get off the Marriage Isn't Boring train.

Really though, instead of screwing over an old character, why can't a creative team muster enough creativity to introduce someone new and fun and excellent for all those incoming wallets--er, I mean fans--to satisfy Joe Q.? How come Spiderman being thirty (right?) and living in Auntie's attic is more awesome than, oh, him actually having something to LOSE? Also, I better be hearing about Mr. Parker/Spidey living the ultimate, swinging bachelor lifestyle.

This isn't an I Hate Marvel post either--uncreativity is cycling through both DC and Marvel. Lowering the bar to make things easier for writers isn't okay. It shouldn't even be an option. Introducing old ideas/villains isn't the worst thing ever, but consistently falling back on what seems easiest is a cop-out and does a disservice to the standards of this industry.

Joe Q. isn't just an idiot for all the reasons I said above, he's also one because he clearly doesn't understand that when you are Editor-in-Chief of a powerhouse publication, you should keep raising the bar for whoever is going to come after you, not leave a big mess and low standards to follow up on.

I guess none of this is important in the face of what appears to be the easier path--why would someone in Marvel go through all the trouble of creating a new, dynamic character? That's what the independent comic books are doing, after all! And golly, who reads those?

I think I'm spent.